I’ve been trying to paint this stupid logo for the past 13 hours. Still it’s one ugly shit. This is fucking taxing. I’m very grouchy now. But I want to win RM30k.

Everytime I enter a contest, I’m almost sure victory is mine. In 2002, I thought the beemer in the controversial The Star Bumper Crossword Puzzle was mine. Why? Cause I submited 30 entries. 30 fucking entries, that’s 120 newspapers. The fucker who took my beemer submited only ONE entry. As if that’s not painful enough, he also won the previous bumper puzzle. It’s a fucking conspiracy!!

I entered the recent Mother’s Day Greetings Contest. Thought I could score a massage chair for Mom and some moolah for myself. But what the fuck, they didn’t even give me a consolation prize. My poem was so original ok, I should have bloody won.

She knew it’s her duty
When I hit puberty
To feed me herbal jelly
While I clutched my belly
(bla bla bla…there’s more but I can’t remember :P) That should be a winner, right? Say yes. SAY YES.

Contests in Malaysia are really suspicious. But yet I�