I have an aunt, he’s my Dad’s sister-in-law. Nobody in the family likes her, but I’m not sure if she’s aware of that. She obviously behaves as though everybody adores her though. It’s weird.
We don’t like her because she’s a scrooge, has superiority complex, talks too much shit and is very patronising. Other than that, she should be pretty easy to live with.
I first got a taste of how she’s like many years ago, when I was a wee kid and she’s only dating my uncle. Dad had bought me a bar of dark chocolate, which I stupidly store in the fridge (never store your chocolates in the fridge, they will melt in room temperature) but wisely rationed so they would last me some weeks. One day I got home from school and found my bar of chocolate all neatly chopped but missing about half from what I had left them.
Brother told me that she had dropped by, looked through our fridge and then had made several trips to the kitchen. Somehow, she had taken the chocolates as hers. Her sheer audacity in chopping up my chocolate so that it’d be more convenient to nick them from the fridge didn’t escape my young mind. You mess with my food, you die.
Throughout the years I still never got around to avenge my chocolates, I thought the opportunity had greeted and left me already. Anyway, we were at her place during the weekends. Dad was being obnoxious, Granny remarked that I had put on weight (in spite of my smugness for losing some chubs) and I was bracing myself for the woman’s next bouts of idiocy. It came of course.
She was asking me about my job. Before I could fill her in, she had already started giving her brand of advice regarding working life. She told me to not care about other things, as long as I’m happy with my job. I was blown away, such gem coming from her!? I actually thanked her for that.
But less than 2 seconds after that, she had already started spewing her shits. She started went on and on and on about “working hard”. That people become successful because they “work very hard”. And then it came, she said that everything she has today came by because she “works very hard”. My mind didn’t register what she said. She had never worked after marrying my Uncle unless you count the times she spends at his office arranging documents and barking at his staff. The bf sniggered and said, “Buffalos work very hard too”.
And then there was silence. And I could hear my chocolates cheering in glee.
justine said:
on March 13, 2006 at 2:58 pm
And of course since no one can stand her your bf got away with that buffalo remark no?
nice one
admin: yes, exactly! hahaha
numenor said:
on March 13, 2006 at 3:04 pm
Wah, smart bf, perfect timing!
Yea, ppl like that are damn annoying. Forever thinking their opinions are right and always needed.
admin: yeah, wanna give them a piece of your mind but don’t want to invite crisis into the family pulak
Giant Sotong said:
on March 13, 2006 at 4:41 pm
Chocolates must be avenged! *sniff*
admin: yes! especially when they are victimised by people who like milk chocolates more!
Cheesecakeerian said:
on March 13, 2006 at 4:57 pm
I have an annoying bimbo aunt too! *strangle*
admin: dont we all? lol
pelf said:
on March 13, 2006 at 5:08 pm
*whoa* Sweet revenge, huh?
admin: the sweetest! hehehe
Cheneille said:
on March 13, 2006 at 6:34 pm
*You mess with my food, you die.*
hahahahahaahhahaha
*The bf sniggered and said, “Buffalos work very hard too”.*
HAAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAH oh boy i should try that on my annoying relatives some time. ahahahahahahah omfg
admin: she was back to her old self in less than 5 minutes though. lol
Dabido(Teflon) said:
on March 13, 2006 at 7:26 pm
‘She obviously behaves as though everybody adores her though. It’s weird’
That is weird … that’s my elder BROTHER!!!! IN A DRESS!!!!!
‘We don’t like her because she’s a scrooge, has superiority complex, talks too much shit and is very patronising.’
OMGoodness, it IS my ELDER BROTHER!!!!!
I can’t beleive it … we must be related or something …
then again:
‘There’s an annoying relative in every family.’
I only have annoying relatives … and it’s still illegal to pay to have them shot … doesn’t seem fair does it?
Oh, and as for the hard work thing, there is a thing in some work places where you can work very very hard, and if the people there think of you as lesser than them, they’ll keep treating you like a door mat and expect you to work for almost free.
[I know, I used to do 13 hour days at one place, and they used to tell me I was lazy … and they’d pretend to catch me ‘working’ sometimes , as though it was an amazing thing to discover - yet they were always having private conversations with their friends about their weekends etc while I was buried.
Lesson for today - hard work sometimes doesn’t mean a thing! … even buffalos can’t afford plasma TV’s as they don’t get paid enough. Not that I used to be a buffalo!]
admin: argh hang on there man, spiking their food with laxatives could be as satisfying as getting them shot
wenJun said:
on March 13, 2006 at 8:26 pm
Mooo……
admin: hehe
slinky said:
on March 13, 2006 at 10:42 pm
the bf is brave indeed…or just pure careless?
admin: heh, definitely not the latter. she had it coming and the bf also cannot stand her. in fact my Dad encourages him! lol
Lainie said:
on March 13, 2006 at 11:23 pm
that is a beautiful comeback, I must say. respek.
admin: yeah thanks babe
Emily said:
on March 14, 2006 at 5:36 am
I have an aunt which will make yours seem like an angel. Bloody hell, my mum had to go for checkups and stuff (health is v. important and we all know that and of course my dad paid for it) and the bloody bitch had the nerve to bicker about how expensive the medical fees were?! I mean WTF?! ITS MY MUMS HEALTH, STUPID B**** (note from bf: wah you so nice, even censored the word for her…lol)
admin: that’s very tactless of her, i’d have bloody told her off with no censored words. my aunt too has a penchant for teaching people how to use their money. i agree with you, always the best healthcare you can afford. hope your mom’s ok.
Shari said:
on March 14, 2006 at 11:13 am
some people are just really annoying; just looking at them makes me angry! currently, i’m facing the annoying question of “did you find a job YET?” from an aunt who has a son;same age as me. Feel like telling her to f.off but that might trigger a family feud.
admin: i hear you babe!
Arth Akal said:
on March 14, 2006 at 12:03 pm
chocolate- 1
aunty - 0
admin: hehe nice one!
Emily said:
on March 14, 2006 at 5:19 pm
Yeah she’s doing fine. Could be better if the oddball wasn’t around…
admin: glad to know. what to do, have to pretend she doesn’t exist i guess.
Lin Peh said:
on March 14, 2006 at 5:34 pm
Maybe she consider yamadeing her hubby is Work ? LOL!
admin: lol i am in no liberty to speculate that
jc said:
on March 16, 2006 at 6:55 am
Learning how to make such people ’shut up’ is an art.
They should hold courses on it. My mom is the nice type….’suffer in silence’. My aunt is much, much, much worse than yours so I have learnt…..my nick - laser mouth. ;P I am only nice to the ones who are nice to me.
admin: yeah, and i’ve yet to master it! teach me lah
anthraxxxx said:
on March 17, 2006 at 2:29 am
Perhaps narcissism is not just necessary to her, it’s one helluva must.
admin: tell me about it!
anthraxxxx said:
on March 17, 2006 at 2:42 am
Faouritve quote of the day -> “You mess with my food, you die”
LOL this is damn good sial. It cracked me up completely.
admin:
lolipop said:
on March 18, 2006 at 2:19 am
everyone has annoying relatives.. so do i…..
iman said:
on August 7, 2006 at 8:29 pm
wow. those kinda ppl are the type u just wanna slap..but a snappy comeback like that!
i salute ur bf.